Long distance relationships are complex beasts. They can be the most important thing in someone’s life, but others don’t take them seriously. They do have a high failure rate, it has to be said, so we’ve put together some tips to help your long distance relationship go the distance.
- You need to pin down the important stuff early on. Are you dating/seeing each other/engaged? Are you exclusive? Are you working towards living together eventually? Once you’ve got this clear, you can be more certain of getting what you need out of this partnership.
- OK, you’re separated by miles, and possibly time zones, but you can still do things together. Phone calls can get dull and repetitive, as you’ll only have so many things to say to each other. Instead, a good idea is to get onto Skype and watch a film together!
- Do communicate every day, though, even if it’s just a text message to say you got soaked on the way to work! Email is your friend, so make sure you use it. Put the effort into your missives, and your significant other will feel important and included. Also, try to send gifts as often as you can, and for no real reason! You can even get same day deliveries option, so surprise your partner with flowers or a DVD every now and then.
- Remember that there are advantages to living apart – no arguments over washing-up styles or toothpaste tube squeezing! You get time with friends and family, and then there’s always the excitement and anticipation of meeting up after a long time.
- Get creative! Set your phones or watches so that a synchronized alarm goes off. When it goes off, you and your partner have to stop and think of each other.
- Realize that you can’t control someone. If someone’s going to cheat or leave a relationship, they’ll do it regardless of distance. You have to trust your partner and just get on with it. There’s nothing to be gained by being suspicious and grilling your partner every time he or she goes out with a new group of people. You both need to have a social life, as it’ll keep you both happy and give you something to do and talk about when you’re together.
- Talk about your future together, especially if you’re planning to live together. Talk about the steps you’re taking towards that goal.
- Visit as often as possible – you won’t survive on just phone calls!
- Stay positive about the nature of a long distance relationship. You get more time to follow career objectives and hobbies. See the times spent apart as good – but temporary, and you’ll realize you’re in a win-win situation.
- Make sure you both have a personal possession from each other. A t-shirt, a cuddly toy, as long as it once belonged to you. This can provide some comfort when times are rough and you can’t be together.